Under The Dome

I’ve fought many battles for years.

As an Oklahoma journalist, I have spent decades looking for the answers to questions about state government.

I’ve seen the good and the bad work done by state agencies, and I have seen state officials fight for what they thought was right or, on the other hand, say something they hoped would get them reelected or become more powerful.

My goal has been to ask questions, gather information and build a story that the taxpayers can use when they have their own questions.

Along the way, I have met and interacted with all sorts of humans - there isn’t enough paper in this edition to accurately describe those whom I met and what they have done.

Then, several weeks ago, things changed.

What I thought would be a morning information session turned into a trip to the emergency room. And what I thought was a sore became a brain tumor. That tumor has become the latest test in my lifelong experience of being epileptic.

Years ago, as a small boy and up to the age of being a college student in Tonkawa, seizures were a part of my life.

My doctor at the time, Richard E. Carpenter, kept me safe and positive. Even today, I know he genuinely cared for me. After Tonkawa, the seizures faded, and I was sure that part of my life had passed.

At least that was what I thought.

I was wrong. In May, the idea of seizures and problems in my brain returned full force and filled my world with fear. That fear hit me like a rushing bus.

Since then, I’ve seen specialists several times, adopted a new medicine and have taken steps for surgery sometime this summer. At the same time, I have tried to still my fear and continue my efforts as a journalist, husband, father and friend. I’ve reached out to the Almighty, and I have heard from many people who have offered to help me in any way possible.

Those phone calls and notes and text messages and emails restored my faith in humanity.

I have also experienced ugliness.

Yes, you might say I’ve witnessed firsthand both sides of the human soul.

At this point, I don’t know what will happen.

The medical professionals I have worked with have gone out of their way to answer my questions, explain the process and to try and still my fear.

And, in some ways, the Almighty has stepped in to help me.

My new neurologist, Dr. Dean Shipley, was once a student under Dr. Carpenter, one of the state’s most noted neurologists. In a sense, I’ve come full circle. That simple fact filled my day with hope. Still, the fear remains.

Sometime in the next month or so, I will have brain surgery.

My goal is to survive, recover, and return to my role of being a journalist in Oklahoma.

Of course, there is also a possibility that I become another data point. I exit - abruptly - stage left and my journalism fades like an Oklahoma sunset. If that is the fate, please know how much I have enjoyed writing for each and every reader.

Oklahoma is a wonderful state, filled with wonderful people.

For me, it has been the perfect place to fight for, a perfect place to raise a family and a perfect place to spend my life as a journalist.

And while I’m still wrestling with all the fear caused by my brain tumor, know that I have discovered one thing -just how much I love those people who take their time to sit down and read my work.

M. Scott Carter is an award-winning political and investigative reporter with more than 40years’ experience covering federal and state government and politics in Oklahoma. He can be reached at scott.carter@swoknews.com.